Save Marriage

They go every other wknd and when they come home I almost have to de-brief them. He shares all kinds of inappropriate things about our marriage and lies about me! He has lost a petition for mod of child support, tryed and failed to get a restraining order on me, now he reporting things to the police. just because he doesnt like that he has no control over me anymore, and only gets to have his kids 4 days a month. I have been advised to do nothing, just document everything, which I already do, and that there really isnt much that can be done about "emotional" abuse..ugh. I am just scared that CPS is going to show up at my door because of a false accusation made by the non-custodial parent and his gf..they have lied a few times and they will most likely do it again..

My parents have been married for 25 years and are now seperating. They fight alot about God because my mother doesnt believe but my father does. I know they difnt fall out love with each other. They didnt even try to fix it. Would it be wrong to suggest they take 30 days and devote it to trying to save their marriage and if it doesnt work they can do whatever?

divorce is final in Feb and she says she is going to tell the judge that we had sex.

I just got through a very bad divorce four months ago, I have a very good male friend who I’ve known for 5 years. We’ve never had anything romantic and I’ve never seen him in any romantic way, nor has he ever come onto me when I was married. He helped me through so much during my marriage troubles and during the divorce.

The problem is I thought after the divorce we’d still be great friends as I need friends during this time but he keeps hitting on me, offering me massages, saying he wants to cuddle, etc. I’ve told him I’m not interested in a relationship, I see him as a friend, I just needs friends now, I’m not looking for a man, etc. but he won’t take a hint! I don’t want to break it down meanly and say I DONT WANT YOU LIKE THAT! but I don’t know what else to do. He even remarks that I seem uncomfortable when he’s coming to me but he keeps doing it. I just severed a big tie with my husband, I don’t want to cut another tie with someone I thought I could trust but I don’t know why he won’t take a hint and stop. I’ve said I just see him as a friend, what else should I have to say..? I really trusted him and it bothers me that he thinks as soon as I’m divorced it’s his turn to "pounce"..We went to dinner tonight he kept bringing up going back to his place, watching a movie and snuggling..ugh..help

hey there,

So of about November last year my parents decided to get divorced. and its been really messy. not amicable at all and its going to the courts. I’m with my mum through and through and totally loyal to her. I know whose caused and done the mistake here. im 14, and able to understand, im not a baby. my mum CONSTANTLY is telling me about my father and all teh bad things he’s doing and what he’s done. im shocked but i believe her anyhow. then i hear my fathers view but maybe because he’s in a different country and im always with my mum or at least my mums side of the family (as she is sorting th divorce out somewhere else) that im more distant to my dads version and i believe my mums side of it more. only because i know she wants the best for me, whereas my father has shown little consideration for me otherwise this would of been over.

What im trying to say is, my mum is always trying to prove that he’s the ”bad” one. frankly i couldn’t care less if they were Both the bad ones. i just DONT want to be involved. i dont want to have to be the one who fixes things. she tells me to email him telling him to give this house here, and that money here, and that is yours and this is hers. and im constantly being told about it. my getaway is at school where no one pesters me about it. i dont mind my parents getting divorced, i know its for the best. why does she have to feel the need to prove something to me? why is she involving me?

she doesn’t understand it upsets me. ive told her, she wont listen. i know what i need to say if any lawyers question me about what i want, i know ill do whats best for me and my mum. why has she got no faith in me? and as far as i know..am i even supposed to be questioned? will i be asked anything?

help please!

desperate 14 year old! no one to talk to! teachers cant help..they’re not exactly going to tell my mum off. friends can only support but not fix. etc..help

I love my wife so much and I want to stay with her for the rest of my life but she wants to leave me again. We were married 14 years ago months after we met in church and we were madly in love. We did everything together and sometimes it almost seemed as though we were the same person. We had our first child a daughter and it was like everything changed. I knew things would change, but in a terrible way. She stopped wanting to spend time with me and her friends and family and she just didn’t want to be around anyone. I just figured it was just being home with our baby all day but shortly after our daughter’s first birthday she filed for divorce. I was devastated. I was raised in church and I believe in the sanctity of marriage so I don’t believe in divorce but after a year of fighting she won and the divorce happened. I begged her to come back to me. I didn’t want my daughter to grow up in a broken home. I didn’t understand why she left. She said I didn’t make her happy and I didn’t act like I loved her anymore or paid her any attention. I prayed for her to come back and chased her to prove how badly I wanted to be with her and after 2.5 years she gave my another chance and we got remarried after that and had 3 more kids. I didn’t want to loose her again so I did everything I could to make her happy. We went to counseling, we spent more time with our kids and each other, and I did everything I could to keep us together. About 4 years later, she started acting very distant towards me and the kids. She started spending more time with our best friends a couple we had known for 8 years, their 2 kids had been best friends with our kids. When I raised questions about this, she said that she needed time away from the family so I backed off. Over a 3 year period, she slowly was more and more distant and spending more time with friends. Her best friend over time confided in me that my wife was spending more and more time with my best friend, her husband and thought they were having an affair. I told her she was being crazy, that they would never do that to our families. Months after that, my wife became pregnant and I thought that this new child would bring us together. When she was 5 months pregnant , she came by my job with divorce papers, said "you’re not the father" and left. I was stunned and embarrassed. I didn’t want to believe it. I went home and all her things were gone and she went to the children’s school and told them we were getting a divorce. I called her and demanded to know why she was leaving again and she told me that she had been having a 2 year affair with my best friend and her unborn child was his. I broke down. To think I trusted her, and to hear that was disgusting. I went to his house and confronted him. He said that my wife loved him and she was going to leave me and we ended up fighting and his neighbors broke it up. The next night, his wife called me and said that he told her about the affair and the baby and that her husband was leaving her. I wanted so bad for her to come back and I still do. Its been 3 years and she’s still with him. After her daughter was born, we got a DNA test and he was the dad and now they also have a son together. He’s gotten a divorce from his wife and my wife is trying to divorce me again but I just want her to be with me. Call me crazy but, I love her and I still want to work it out with her. My children are very upset when they visit their mother as well as his children are upset when they visit and everything is very complicated right now. I’ve begged her to come back but she just won’t. I’m willing to forgive her and to except her two children, so is there anything I can do?

I love my wife so much and I want to stay with her for the rest of my life but she wants to leave me again. We were married 14 years ago months after we met in church and we were madly in love. We did everything together and sometimes it almost seemed as though we were the same person. We had our first child a daughter and it was like everything changed. I knew things would change, but in a terrible way. She stopped wanting to spend time with me and her friends and family and she just didn’t want to be around anyone. I just figured it was just being home with our baby all day but shortly after our daughter’s first birthday she filed for divorce. I was devastated. I was raised in church and I believe in the sanctity of marriage so I don’t believe in divorce but after a year of fighting she won and the divorce happened. I begged her to come back to me. I didn’t want my daughter to grow up in a broken home. I didn’t understand why she left. She said I didn’t make her happy and I didn’t act like I loved her anymore or paid her any attention. I prayed for her to come back and chased her to prove how badly I wanted to be with her and after 2.5 years she gave my another chance and we got remarried after that and had 3 more kids. I didn’t want to loose her again so I did everything I could to make her happy. We went to counseling, we spent more time with our kids and each other, and I did everything I could to keep us together. About 4 years later, she started acting very distant towards me and the kids. She started spending more time with our best friends a couple we had known for 8 years, their 2 kids had been best friends with our kids. When I raised questions about this, she said that she needed time away from the family so I backed off. Over a 3 year period, she slowly was more and more distant and spending more time with friends. Her best friend over time confided in me that my wife was spending more and more time with my best friend, her husband and thought they were having an affair. I told her she was being crazy, that they would never do that to our families. Months after that, my wife became pregnant and I thought that this new child would bring us together. When she was 5 months pregnant , she came by my job with divorce papers, said "you’re not the father" and left. I was stunned and embarrassed. I didn’t want to believe it. I went home and all her things were gone and she went to the children’s school and told them we were getting a divorce. I called her and demanded to know why she was leaving again and she told me that she had been having a 2 year affair with my best friend and her unborn child was his. I broke down. To think I trusted her, and to hear that was disgusting. I went to his house and confronted him. He said that my wife loved him and she was going to leave me and we ended up fighting and his neighbors broke it up. The next night, his wife called me and said that he told her about the affair and the baby and that her husband was leaving her. I wanted so bad for her to come back and I still do. Its been 3 years and she’s still with him. After her daughter was born, we got a DNA test and he was the dad and now they also have a son together. He’s gotten a divorce from his wife and my wife is trying to divorce me again but I just want her to be with me. Call me crazy but, I love her and I still want to work it out with her. My children are very upset when they visit their mother as well as his children are upset when they visit and everything is very complicated right now. I’ve begged her to come back but she just won’t. I’m willing to forgive her and to except her two children, so is there anything I can do?

Moving to Oz from the UK next year, but my daughter will only be 16. Divorced from her father. Can he stop our move? Do we need legal papers signed to take her?

We know the process to apply and my partner is already an Australian citizen, but not sure if my ex husband can refuse to let her leave the country.

Thank you

I have moved out and have told her i want a divorce. Since then she has contacted several people from my congregation trying to drag them into it. She has contacted my boss( even though im not supposed to know) she emails me every day, comes to my office and yells and screams at me . I want it to stop.

My childhood was spent being abused verbally, physically, and sexually by my father. He gave my younger two brothers the same treatment. He was also terribly abusive of our mother; once going so far as to break one of her arms with a rolling pin. After a teacher at my school noticed bruises on my older brother, my father ended up in prison for seven years. He is now a registered sex offender, and I’ve had no contact with him for almost seventeen years.

My mother passed away last week. Her funeral is planned for this coming Saturday. I have heard from my Aunt (my father’s sister) that my father inquired with her about time time and place the funeral is being held. Because I refuse to see the man I asked my husband to go see him and remind him that he is most certainly not welcome. My husband was unfortunate unable to track him down, and currently no one knows where he is.

I do not want him at the funeral. Neither does anyone else. I have power of attorney over my mother’s estate if that makes a difference. I don’t know if I can simply call the police or what. The cemetery is not on private property, so I don’t know what the law is. I live in New York.

If anyone has any information please help.
re Uncle: He molested and abused my brothers and I. He beat my mother. And you feel I’m making the drama? Trying to stand there peacefully next to a man who did all he could to virtually ruin our lives is seriously not a pleasant idea.
Re Diana B.: "To give Uncle the benefit of the doubt – we are all strangers and you’re asking us all to accept your side of what happened."

Yeah… Clearly when I was six I unintentionally seduced the man, and my mom was probably bad at washing socks or something, so she deserved some punches to the eye. How foolish of me not to see dad’s side of things.

my parents keep fighting and seperating, and then they come back together and act like everything i s fine and that they love each other. I always believe them, its all good for about 3 months…and then the fighting and the "im kicking you out of the house" begins again. And i honestly cant take it anymore, what do i do? i just want to like, not care. But the worst part is that i care TOO much…like my family is everything to me, they’re my best friends. And see it all fall appart kills me inside. How do i become stronger?

well…recently i posted a question what i can do about my parents constant arguing. my mother and step father have seperated twice alrdy, this is the third time and my mother told me the other day that theyre now going through a divorce, im upset, but i try not to look it in front of my mother because..well let me explain. my mother feels horrible about the divorce because she says i alrdy have enough going on (not gona go into it) and she thinks tht she let me get used to my dad being around.. they were bak together for about 2 years, and she thinks tht she let me down, she hasnt, and i keep telling her tht, wut ive told her is tht i just need time to adjust, i feel bad tht she thinks im mad at her, but i told her im not, so i have to stay strong for her. the problem is shell b normal one second and then another shell start crying and use (for lack of a better word) winy voice…i try to tell her tht im not mad at her and at least they didnt end on horrible terms…but shell keep at it..idk how to help her, her crying and being upset over me is making me feel worse then the divorce, i knw tht shell get over it eventually but still…anyway, does anyone have any advice?

I got divorced when she was 2, and I have had to work 2 and 3 jobs at a time. For the past 2 years I have had a job that has allowed me to spend a lot more time with her. However, every Time she leaves for the weekend or for Christmas or for the summer I feel horrible about missing out on the last 10 years. today she graduated from 6th grade and has gone to her dad’s for the first part of summer. During the graduation they showed slide shows of the kids from when they were in Kindergarten until the present. It was so sweet. All I can think about is how I wasn’t around enough when she was in grade school and i feel horrible and guilty. She is a great kid and we are very close. I don’t want to feel like this. Are there any helpful blogs or support groups out there? Please, no sarcastic comments. I really am hurting.

I can accept it has to happen and its my choice but me and Husband are still living together and he seems so strong but every little thing sets me of. One minute im fine the next i just burst into tears. Is there a way to make this stop because i cant handle the pain and not being able to get on with my life?

My husband and I have been married for 6 years this past March. 5 years ago, I cheated on him. However, I never stopped loving him. We decided to work things out. Occasionally we would have these huge arguments and he would threaten divorce. A couple of times we came close to filing but he would always back out and say that he doesn’t want a divorce because he is happy with me and he loves me. This last time, we actually filed but he wants to stay friends with benefits. His reasoning for wanting it this time is because he never got over my affair. He also says that he only stayed with me for so long because he was afraid of not being able to find anyone else. However, he cheated on me a few years ago as well but I forgave him for that. He also says that he is not attracted to me. All of these reasons don’t come up all at once. Every time I ask him if we can work it out, he gives me a different reason then the one before. How do I win his heart back and stop our divorce? I am desperate. I love him so much and I don’t want to lose him. Is it possible that he still loves me and just doesn’t know it or is it over? Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you so much.

My parents have been acting extra lovey dovey these past 2 weeks. I kept telling them that they were acting strange, but I thought that they were just reconnecting with each other or something. I thought things were better than ever.

"We have really serious bad news to tell you." That’s how they started it off today. I was crying so hard that I didn’t really even take it all in. They said they were "thinking" about divorce and have been seeing a marriage counselor. They have been married for 20 years. I am devistated, I can’t let this happen.

1) Why were there NO warning signs? They pretty much NEVER fight except for the small ocasional normal argument.
2) Why have they been getting along? It seems genuine too that they love eachother.
3) They told me that they love eachother, so how does this even make sense?!?
4) How can I sway them to not get a divorce? It is crushing me.

*Please don’t tell me that I can’t stop it. How can I TRY?

My wife slapped me for calling her worthless and in the heat of the moment I grabbed her and bit into the side of her head.I can’t afford this right now or ever for that matter.
I better teach you a lesson samantha and report you.

I love my dad, i mean hes a really good father but the bitching is just annoying. My parents got divorced a few years ago. Every time my mother does something he does something remotely divorce related he blames her for being a bad parent. He doesn’t say it exactly like that but he means it. He says " i wanted to have a good stable family but your mother decided otherwise ". " we had a five bedroom house and a good family but i guess your mother didn’t want that ". Also let me tell you they got divorced because my mom cheated. She also had a baby by an unknown father, the baby had a miscarriage of some sort so no dna. Now i dont think my mom shouldve cheated but i hate what my dad says about it. " we had a good family but your mother decided to throw around her life and have a baby with dwight ". " i plans for a good life for my family but i guess your mother didnt agree with those plans". Yeah after a while this gets really irritating. Hes also afraid of chanve and is a little overprotective. My mother changed schools without permission because its was too far. The school she changed me too is the same distance away as the same school so he can drop and pick me up as normal. My old school is a magnet school so he thinks for some reason its the best school in the world. My mom said he can pick me up whenever he pleases and she said she can arrange a babysitter. He doesnt like a babysitter and acts like the first babysitter i get will rape me. He says wny would i let someone else take care of you when i can. I think this has to do with his dad leaving him when he was young and he promised to himself to never do what his father did. I wont go back to my old school becuz its a magnet school and they have a long waiting list. He act like its a private school and says thats a top of the line school and your doing great in there so why change it. I still got a c in math becuz of a crappy teach dispite all its greatness. He also says the arrangement me and your mother had was good so why change it. Personaly i think there both being selfish in the scholl decision but i dont like the school i was in, i wasnt happy in all my friendships and all my friends are going to leave or probably be in another class so i would be happy to leave that school. My dads going to court for the school thing im just worried they would change the custody. Right now i can go to either parent anytime i want. The judge might give more custody to one parent, i hope it isnt my dad though he nags ti much for everthing i still love him though its for my own good:) he also says im not going to school there at all but school starts in a few days and law says 7 unexcused absences equals troble. So i guess that thats it sry for length. And bad grammer is becuz im on my tablet so it all might not make sense:p

I feel our marriage is wilting and growing cold. Any advice on what to do or where to go for help. There is no infidelity yet that I know of.

my parents have been fighting for two years. they just got divorced but they keep going back to court. I live with my dad now and all he says now adays is how he doesnt have any money because of all the money he spent on court things. the court made a parenting plan that said i had to live with one parent every week. but that never worked out for me so now i just live with my dad. But a few weeks ago i went on a trip with my dad and it wasnt my week to be with him. so now my mom wants to put my dad in jail and is asking for more money. it seems like every little thing they do wrong they have to take it to court.

ive already heard that i should go to counseling

if anyones been through the same or has advice on what i could do for them. its greatly appreciated

THANKX!!!!!!