Basically, if one party wants the divorce and the other doesn’t, you can’t force the person to stay married to you. Even if you don’t sign papers, you will eventually be divorced by default after a period of time allowed by your state. Another thing to remember is that if you don’t show up for a hearing or a trial, then the likelihood that things will go in your favor is greatly diminished because you did not show up to dispute what your soon-to-be ex is saying, so often the court will grant things in the other person’s favor by default if you don’t show up.

The best thing you can do is to contact an attorney. If you can’t afford one, then you can go to the courthouse and ask for an "ex parte continuance", which is basically an urgent postponement granted as soon as possible, so that you can have time to seek adequate legal representation. If your divorce is going to a trial and is not merely a hearing, trust me, you will want an attorney. Trials are more stressful and it’s better not to represent yourself. If you can’t afford an attorney, you can ask at the courthouse’s Family Law division if they can give you a list of attorneys who work on a sliding fee scale or who work for free. There are many out there who do. Another thing you can do is to ask your spouse’s attorney if they can represent you both. My attorney refused to represent my ex-husband because his behavior was such that it was impossible to be impartial where he was concerned and my attorney quite frankly, hated him. Still, many couples use the same attorney and it works out fine for both parties. Whatever you do, I would go to the courthouse and tell them your situation and see what they suggest you do. They can’t give legal advice, but they can tell you what forms you need to fill out in order to postpone the divorce trial. I wish you all the best in this. I know how difficult this must be for you, as I went through a very ugly divorce that ended up going to trial.